My heart hurts [06 Apr 2006|09:22pm] I m always crying for us and for you. do you burn?

[05 Feb 2005|10:39am] This live journal is dead 4 fell to ashes| do you burn?

[04 Feb 2005|10:31pm] I think my life is going to change..........and not for the better <3 do you burn?

[04 Feb 2005|04:27pm] Me Love You Long Time by ruby mae Your name Your partner You two are Soulmates Your meeting was by Fate They are your Protector You are their Shining star Your love will Last for all eternity Quiz created with MemeGen! :) you guys notice I bitch and moan every other day? damn........I need to stop........being cuddly to other people. do you burn?

[03 Feb 2005|04:32pm] I am going insane. This isnt good. I get more and more paranoid......man I am so fucked up. I feel like I should die everyday so I can be punished for living If I had a knife, i would cut it, If I had a gun, I would shoot it, if I had a bridge, I would jump it I am driving myself insane.....and I cant do anything. I get the most accusing thoughts about shit, and I hate it. I should die. I suck.I am worthless, I dont deserve someone like Tori. Tori doestn need to hear my bitchin and moanin every fucking day......... fucking hate this. If I had a chance to start mylife over, I would end it. I need a fucking vacation <3 do you burn?

[02 Feb 2005|05:57pm] The circle of trust works...in a way....sigh. I should have realize that I am trying way to fucking hard a long time ago.....this is going to be a depressing next few weeks. DO YOU Play an instrument?:: guitar...i suck Watch TV more than 60 hours a week?:: like......3hrs a week, lol Like to sing?:: yea Have a job?:: work for my parents Have a cell phone?:: Yes Like to play sports?:: football...um...hacky sack? Have a boyfriend/girlfriend?:: Yeah Have a crush on someone?:: no Live somewhere NOT in the United States?:: no Have more than 5 TVs in your house?:: 6 Have any special talents/skills?:: I suck at life Excercise daily?:: 4 times a week Like school?:: no.........I really dont Sing the alphabet backwards?:: No Stand on your tip toes without wearing shoes?:: no Speak any other languages?:: chinese Go a day without food?:: Yes Stay up for more than 24 hours?:: Yes Read music, not just tabs?:: I used to, back in 7th-8th grade Roll your tongue?:: Yes Eat a whole pizza?::personal pizza HAVE YOU EVER Snuck out of the house?:: yeah Cried to get out of trouble?:: no Gotten lost in your city?:: No Seen a shooting star?:: yes Been to any other countries besides the united states?:: China Had a serious surgery?:: no Stolen something important to someone else?:: no Solved a rubiks cube?:: not that smart Gone out in public in your pajamas?:: Yes Cried over a girl?:: more often than id like to admit, im an emo bitch Cried over a boy?:: yes......sigh long story Kissed a random stranger?:: no Hugged a random stranger?:: yes Been in a fist fight?:: No Been arrested?:: No Done drugs?:: yes Had alcohol?:: yes, hate it though. Laughed and had milk come out of your nose?:: nope Pushed all the buttons on an elevator?:: no.....but now I want to Gone to school only to find you had the day off because of a holiday/etc?:: No Swore at your parents?:: yes I hate them Been to Warped Tour?:: nope, really want to Kicked a guy where it hurts?:: yes, and punched them there.. Been in love?:: IDK>..........I hate this question.... Been close to love?:: sigh.........IDK Been to a casino?:: no Ran over an animal and killed it?:: no Broken a bone?:: No Gotten stitches?:: no Had a waterballoon fight in winter?:: That actually sounds fun Drank a whole gallon of milk in one hour?:: ew.....no Made homemade muffins?:: no Bitten someone?:: Yeah Been to disneyland/disneyworld?:: I have no life More than 5 times?:: No Been to Niagra Falls?:: no, I want to Burped in someones face?:: yes... Gotten the chicken pox?:: yeah WHENS THE LAST TIME YOU Brushed your teeth:: morning Went to the bathroom:: hour ago Saw a movie in theaters:: A few weeks ago Read a book:: yesteray, -The Testament by John Grisham Had a snow day:: last mth Had a party:: Never Had a slumber party:: dude........I am a guy Made fun of someone:: few hours ago in school Tripped in front of someone:: on the stairs going up Went to the grocery store:: a while ago Got sick:: a while ago Cursed:: in school PICK ONE Fruit/vegetables:: Fruit Black/white:: Black Lights on/lights off:: depends on whats happenng, TV/movie:: Movie Car/truck:: Car Body spray/lotion:: lotion Cash/check:: Cash Pillows/blankets:: Blankets Headache/stomach ache:: Stomach ache Paint/charcoal:: Paint Chinese food/mexican food:: Mexican........chinese food suck Summer/winter:: Summer.... Snow/rain:: snow Fog/misty:: Misty Rock/rap:: Rock Meat/vegetarian:: Meat Boy/girl:: girl Chocolate/vanilla:: Vanilla Sprinkles/icing:: icing Cake/pie:: depends on what it is French toast/french fries:: French toast Strawberries/blueberries:: Strawberries Ocean/swimming pool:: swimming pool.....Ill drown either way Hugs/kisses:: Hugs Cookies/muffins:: Cookies Wallet/pocket:: wallet Emo/goth:: Emo Pink/purple:: Pink Cat/dog:: cat Long sleeve/short sleeve:: Long Sleeve Pants/shorts:: Pants Winter break/spring break:: Spring break Spring/autumn:: spring Clouds/clear sky:: Clear sky Moon/mars:: Moon FRIENDSHIP How many friends do you have?:: 14I think, I am guessin What are their names?:: Amanda Stewart, Amanda Sumner, Madeline Green,Nikki Bush, Souyi Mai, Shi Mai, David Lee, Mez, Shawn Mullins, Igor R. Tori Walsh, Sebastian, Josh M.,Conrad F Do you have a best friend?:: um....a few Have you ever liked one of your friends?:: of course Do you have more guy friends or more girl friends?:: girls they're easier to get along with Have you ever lost a friend?:: many times Have you ever gone to an amusement park with a friend?:: no Whats an inside joke between you and a friend?:: thongs Have you ever gotten in a big arguement with a friend?:: Yes Whats the nicest thing you've ever done for a friend?:: Be there for them Whats the nicest thing a friend has ever done for you?:: I don't know Do you miss any of your old friends?:: yes What friend have you known the longest?:: idk Do you regret anything you've done to a friend?:: Yeah If so, what is it?:: being a shitty friend How often do you spend time with your friends?:: in school, whenever people try to plan something Do any of your friends drive?:: yes Has a friend of yours ever died?:: No Whats the dumbest thing you've done with a friend?:: Idont know What do you think your friends think of you?:: Anything,, everything OTHER STUFF What is your favourite genre of music?:: Rock What time is it now?:: 6:34pm What day is it?:: Wednesday Whens the last time you called someone?:: yesterday How much money do you have right now?:: $25 Are you hungry?:: no Whatcha doin?:: This survey Do you like parades?:: Not really Do you like the moon?:: sure What are you going to do when youre done with this?:: take a shower Isnt cup a funny word when you repeat it over and over?:: No If you could have any magical power what would it be?:: Fly Have you ever had a picnic?: yes Did you ever have one of those skip-its when you were young?:: no but my friend did What about sock em boppers?:: same as above Are you wearing any socks right now?:: yes DO YOU THINK YOU ARE funny?:: no pretty?:: freakish sarcastic?:: very lazy?:: Yes hyper?:: every now and then friendly?:: try to be evil?:: at times smart?:: no strong?:: no talented?:: I suck at life dorky?:: a bit FOR OR AGAINST suicide:: For love:: For drunk drivers:: Against airplanes:: For war:: Against canada:: For united states:: For(which means im anti bush) rock music:: For gay marriage:: For school:: For surveys:: For parents:: For cars:: For killing:: Against britney spears:: Against coffee:: for pants:: for WOULD YOU EVER Sky dive?:: yes Play strip poker?:: no one wants to see me naked Run away?:: yes Curse at a teacher?:: yes Not take a shower for a week?:: no Ask someone out?:: not at this moment Lie to someone to make them think better of you?:: no Visit a foreign country for more than a month?:: Sure Go scuba diving?:: after I leanr how to swim Write a book?: too lazy Become a rockstar?:: If I had the talent Have casual sex?:: No LAST QUESTIONS What shampoo do you use?:: Suave Whens the last time you did something sexual with the opposite sex?:: kissing? What kind of computer do you have?:: Hp What grade are you in?:: 12th Do you like to throw popcorn at people in the movies?:: No Or just make out?:: depend How many posters do you have in your room?:: 5 How many cds do you have?:: a lot What time is it now?:: 6:39pm do you burn?

[01 Feb 2005|05:10pm] ..........ignore my other post, Fri,sat,sun wasnt so good. I am better New schedule is ok......I am tired though. <3 ..........................I hope this goes on forever. do you burn?

fUcK iT [30 Jan 2005|10:48am] Fuck everything..............Fuck you parents, friends, and anyone else I forgot this is complete bullshit life. nothing is a fairy tale, nothing will ever be a fucking fairy tale.dont grow up being so fucking ignorant in this world, open your eyes and get out of the fucking past. goddamn I should be telling myself this. Fuck my mind for being so fucked over. fucking hate my reality that i live in, the standards that I set, and why I must always find something to complain and bitch about. fuck it all. Ifucking hate me right now, I hate what I am, what I look like, and why the fuck I am still alive. Fuck it. EVerything is worth it, and nothing will last it. I bitch nag, and moan about worthless shit that other peopld dont care about. I find retarded shit to be pissed at other people. I hate who I am. I need to get the fuck away, but I want to take yuo with me........ I always feel like I am competing with you, even if you dontknow who you are. Fuck you for everything. I've been comparing myself to you all this time and I dont even fucking know why. I hate you some times, no most of the fuckign time. You somehow set the standards for everything. You got almost everything you want, and fuck you for getting everything, and everyone I cuoldnt. fuck you asshole. I want you out of my fucking life. fuck it all, fuck this, fuck my life, fuck you, especially you. Fuck off. do you burn?

[30 Jan 2005|10:28am] That was one shitty stupid night little kids suck....*correction, little 12-13 year olds sucks fucking wasted night. <3 fuck this heart. do you burn?

[28 Jan 2005|09:49pm] do it and Ill give you a little something something :) 1. What is my middle name? 2. Do I have a pet? 3. What music group(s) do I listen to the most? 4. Do I have a sibling? How many? Name(s)? 5. What is my favorite color? 6. What do I really prefer- Staying home with a friend or going out in a big group? 7. What is my obsession? (could be 2 things) 8. What/who will I always laugh at? (could be a few things) 9. Do I prefer scary movies or romance movies? 10. What is my favorite TV show? 11. What is my favorite city? 12. What health problem do I have? Or at least describe it. 13. What friend have I known for the longest amount of time? 14. What am I going to college for? 15. What instrument do I play? 16. What do I always bring with me when I go to a friend's house? 17 what is my favorite movie? 18. Where will I go first for coffee? 19. What is my favorite ice cream? 20. What have I been doing longer-- singing or playing an instrument? 21. whats my bigger fear dark or scary movies? 22. where did i move from..?(what school? 4 extra credit too!!!) 3 fell to ashes| do you burn?

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